I made a pinky promise

I have two boys. Peyton will be 2 years old in late July and Kobe will be 6 years old in mid June. I stay home with Peyton while Kobe goes to Kindergarden 9am-2pm most days.

I also run this (blogging, coaching, event curating, and production creation), I babysit about 3 days a week and mystery shop periodically. So I have alot going on.

Parenting in itself is a fulltime job even if your kids are in school because you still have caring for home, making appointments, running errands, and selfcare (which is an essential piece to not jumping off a bridge).

Recently, at one of my monthly 'Sistahs in Motherhood Support Circles' I realized one of the reasons I may have been struggling with my five-nager (a five year old that acts like a teenager) was lack of mental preparation and total commitment to gentle/attachment mixed with conscious parenting.

SIDE NOTE: For me conscious parenting is about love and transformation. Allowing our kids to love (build, correct, enlighten, help, and teach) us as we do the same for them. It's about recongizing their humaness and our own.

I enjoyed pregnancy (minus the lack of sleep) and birth. But parenting has been getting the best of me. I've been yelling, threatening, and plucking lips. These are all things I said I wanted to avoid.

So to get on track and start being the mom I want to be and the mom these particular kids need (forget what society or community says and thinks) I am reading 'The Conscious Parent: Transforming Ourselves, Empowering Our Childern' by Shefali Tsabary and I pinky promised Kobe I would not yell or hit anymore (because that's not love).

I'm afraid to fail. But I had to give my full commitment aka belief in it just like I did with natural birth and breastfeeding. With those it didn't matter what was going on around me nor who was looking at me sideways. I said I was going to do it, I learned how and I DID IT!

This will be no different.

Are you on a conscious parenting journey? How is it going?